People often ask why I share parts of my personal life with people I don't even like. They are often astounded that I am as equally open and transparent with strangers as I am with people I know quite well.

I wonder why they are so astounded. Who created this rule that personal sharing should occur only if you like someone? What is the pitfall in sharing with someone you don't necessarily like? There's the oft-repeated notion that the act of sharing our personal lives only with those we like (or love) is a way of reinforcing how much we like/love them. Such sharing, in other words, is a gift. But really—if the gift isn't good enough to give to a complete stranger, why on earth would you give it to someone you liked? I think this notion of the "gift" is just a way for people to protect themselves.

We live in a day and age when we feel our thoughts, feelings, and past—the very things which make us who we are—are unacceptable. The more we believe that who we are should only be shared with certain people, the more we unwittingly collude in reinforcing the unacceptability of who we are. Think about the benefits of creating an atmosphere of personal transparency and emotional spontaneity with everyone we meet. All it takes is one person to be open and honest to make others feel welcome and safe to be the same—to let them know (consciously or otherwise) that it's o.k. to be who they really are.

I realise that lots of people prefer to be much more "private", but what does that really mean? In many cases it means that we're afraid to tell others how we really feel—or to tell them about our past—because we fear we won't be respected, cared for, or loved by them if they find those things out. "Privacy", in other words, is one of many ways in which we protect ourselves from what we perceive as a hostile world. If I can make an effort to be completely open and honest with someone (even someone I don't like per se), I can help that person feel more at ease to be his true self. And indeed, when one feels more at ease being his true self with the people around him, he feels just a little more loved than he did yesterday.

The kind of openness I advocate also demonstrates a deep respect and appreciation for all fellow man (even those we may not necessarily like). When I'm open with another person—any person—the message I send is that I care enough about that person as a human being to be open with them. This can foster a sense of community and love that is deeply lacking in our everyday lives.